March 2011
67 posts
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In less than two weeks, I’ll be on the road to move out west. A couple days ago, on a whim, I decided to go on a date with this chick I met. I was wary, because months ago I broke up with my long-time girlfriend and all dates I’d gone on since were slightly miserable. Whether it was because the girl was boring, or kind of dumb, or just liked Glee a little too much (which I guess is...
February 2011
87 posts
Hey guys, you can stop pretending to give a shit...
Anne Hathaway introducing Hilary Swank introducing...
BRRRRRRRRRAMMMMMMMMMM
I keep wanting to make an Oscars joke, but I'm too...
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Just learned my lesson...
re: Party Down. Don’t ever watch it. You’ll just be sad and angry when it’s over.
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In the middle of uploading a video to the Cracked server, the power in my entire po-dunk town went out. Why? Because of rain. Correction: Slight rain. Cue the twenty mile drive to a Dunkin’ Donuts just so I can continue doing my job. Add another item to the list of “reasons I’m glad I’m moving to LA.” On the bright side, though: Donuts YUM!
L O S T Answers: David Shephard: Intergalactic... →
I am particularly fond of my most recent LOST Answer. It’s pretty long, so I’ve only included the “TL;DR” part below. Now back to making fun of teenagers on Tumblr…
lostanswers:
TL;DR: David Shephard was actually Jack and Kate’s son, and he represented the three purposes of the Sideways world: Remember. Let Go. Move On.
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Battlesong Galactica
Several years ago, I wrote a bunch of songs inspired by Battlestar Galactica (the new incredible one, not the old one I have no interest in seeing). I wrote a crapload, but only recorded a few (my favorite’s here). One thing I wanted to do that I never did is write a bunch of instrumental songs inspired by the 12 colonies. I’m fairly certain these will never happen. The titles were my...
Moving/SXSW
I’m finally moving to LA in a few weeks. Hazaa! I could drone on and on about how excited I am, or about the things that have kept me here, or the things that are waiting for me there, but I won’t. I’ll just leave it at “Hazaa!”
And if anyone’s going to South by Southwest this year, let me know. I will be there. We should wave to each other from afar (But...
Donate To Planned Parenthood In Honor Of Rep. Mike...
Today’s events were a huge disappointment, especially after Rep. Speier’s speech that you should watch now if you haven’t already.
Way to go, villains.
katespencer:
I just donated to Planned Parenthood in honor of Representative Mike Pence, the anti-women, anti-choice mastermind behind today’s defunding of Planned Parenthood. A letter informing him of my donation in his honor...
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Britney Spears' third comeback album drops in late...
Smart/Beautiful/Funny/Talented-Women-Who-Like-a-lot...
It’s been about an hour since I posted something titled “Snark-of-the-Day”, and I am now being followed by snarkysnarker. I didn’t know this was how Tumblr worked until just now, so I’ve adjusted the title of this post accordingly.
Snark-of-the-day
Hey, someone should go Photoshop Admiral Ackbar clearly having a stroke and he’s all “It’s a splrbap!” Or, like, just Ackbar by some stuff and junk, and he says “It’s some crap!” Or maybe by Jabba’s scrotum and he says “It’s a sack!” Any one of those, really, or others I haven’t thought of yet. I think I’m onto...
“Nobody is more qualified to multitasking and doing all the things that you need...”
– Sarah Palin, who clearly forgot about “Geniuses”. (via speakwell)
Some paintings that look exactly like photos →
abeepp:
Swaim’s godfather, William Glen Crooks paints landscapes and cityscapes that look like photos, however he doesn’t just take photos and paint them, he sees as a camera would — beautiful and inspiring in the least. At least for me.
The millions of people who've heard of Arcade Fire...
Petition To Make Sure There Isn't a "Glee: The...
Also, let’s get these kids some good tutors so they can skip a couple grades.
Signed by…
thousands millions of people
There is a blog that I follow. I forget that I follow it until about once every two weeks when it posts about 15 things at once. The only reason I follow it is because I think its name is adorable. I don’t have any interest in the posts, or the blog in general. I will never reblog or “like” anything posted on it, but I will probably follow it forever. The blog in question is...
Wikileaks Releases Documents Linking People...
My friend Pat wrote this fake article on his blog. Someone took it as fact and posted it on IMDB. I’m pretty sure this means that The Onion should hire him for writing such a believable piece of satire. Go do that, The Onion.
I also think this means that the girl who posted it actively Googles “Aniston-Pitt Divorce” all day, every day. Let it go, sweetie. Let it go.
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Snooki on the red carpet
“I love Bruno Mars and all the shit that he’s wroten… can I say that?”
You can, but shouldn’t, say any of those words. I use the word “words” lightly.
Also, why is she at the Grammys?
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bradyocallahan asked: This might sound like a stupid question, but did you really try to get out of that wipe board window?
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Oh, yeah...
“More like ‘Freegypt’.”
Nailed it.
Three Dead Friends! (Video Series) →
cracked:
Michael, Dan, and Cody have been missing for months. Our new mini-series explains where they’ve been, why they were where they were, and (maybe most importantly) why they smell so bad now.
“Check it out!” - Cracked.com Editor-in-Chief Jack O’Brien
Here’s the other thing I did when I was in LA for a few days back in December. Six-episode mini-series in one night? Don’t...
Secret Project Revealed Soon!
thisdanobrien:
Back in December, Michael Swaim, Cody, Abe our director and Matt our producer locked ourselves in a conference room for an entire night and promised ourselves we’d have a full miniseries filmed by morning. We wrote and shot it in a day and it was one of the most exhausting and exciting experiences I’ve had at Cracked. We started after we put in a full day at the office, and we...
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